AB-PA Explained

Summary of AB-PA explained:

1. AB-PA Stands for Attachment Base Parental Alienation. Attachment pathology and personality disorder pathology. The pathology derives solutions and methods for diagnosis and treatment.

2. AB-PA is not new form of pathology, this is standard and established pathology which relates to attachment pathology and personality disorder. AB-PA is the diagnosis.

3. There are about 5-6% of the population which are narcissists personality disorder and another 5-6% that are having border line personality. That makes that 10% of the divorce cases will involve a narcissistic personality or border line personality. In that case it takes only one of the parents for the divorce to become excessive high conflict divorce situation. And that parent creates it's intense conflict that moves through the child and destroys the family.

4. Today there is none that are doing anything to stop it from happening: Professional psychology is doing nothing to stop that, the legal system is doing nothing to stop that. The children are losing a relationship, sometime for life with a loving parent and the system is leaving them to be staying with a narcissistic or border line parent.

5. Mental health professional do not get into high conflict divorce as this is a risky domain to handle: They may be exposed for legal claims or professional complaints by the narcissistic or border line parent, and there is a little reward as a therapy as the parents are in high conflict condition with each other. Mental health professionals turn into other domains which are less risky and more rewarding such as ADHD, Trauma and others.

6. In the 80's, Gardner research parental alienation cases but since in his research he skipped the diagnosis process offered by professional psychology and jump into defining his own model, he ended with proposing a new model for defining a new pathology and named it Parental Alienation Syndrom (PAS). The new model offered by Gardner was based on the symptoms he observed rather on the professional psychology diagnosis so he failed to diagnose the existing pathology of narcissistic border line personality and tried to define a new pathology of his own. Legal, court and justice system are designed to follow the laws and are not designed to handle family therapy: The law not figure out where the pathology is in the family or litigate whether the child should take soccer or music lessons. The court needs to rely on professional consulting from professional psychology and this where the Gradner's new pathology for Parental Alienation Syndrom (PAS) pathology failed in courts as it was missing the professional psychology diagnosis process to identify the existing pathology for narcissistic border line personality.

7. When a child rejecting a parent - that is an Attachment related pathology. The attachment system in the brain govern the love and bonding throughout the lifespan, including grief and loss. The attachment system never spontaneously dis functions. It only dis function due to response from pathogenic exposure.

8. Divorce is the end of the marriage not the end of the family as is the case when children are involved. The unite marriage structure is replaced by post divorce structure of separation of the couple while they are yet united by the bonds each have to the children. When there is conflicts between the parents that involve the bonds of the children with each the child is torn apart. As the child can not maintain that stress for long he would eventually drop the bonds with one of the parents as not to be torn by the pull of the other parent.

9. Children have the right to love both parents and to be loved by both parents. There are four type of child-parent relationships: Mother-son, Mother-daughter, Father-son, Father-daughter. All of them are important for development and none of them are expandable.

Mother-son: The son will adopt his mother as a template for his wife and more

Mother-daugther: The daughter adapts female self esteem and self identity and she will use that as a template for raising her own children later and more

Father-son: the son adapts male self esteem and self identity and more

Father-daugher: The daughter adapts her father as a template for her husband and more

10. The narcissistic border line person can not process sadness and grief and translate them into anger and resentment loaded with revengeful wishes (John Boyle ). The narcissistic if vulnerable to rejection while the border line is vulnerable to abandonment. The narcissistic border line person is related to domestic-violence and sex abuse background. When the divorce happen there is rejection and abandonment which are translated to anger, revenge and anxiety of abandonment feelings the narcissistic border line person have whenever the children are and share affection to the other parent. the narcisstic border line person who have an abused trauma background (physical, sexual or mental ) begin to think there is an abusing behaviour and there is a threat coming from the other parent towards the children and develops false believe that the children are in danger. This lead to false aligations to CPS (Child protection services) and stays in high anxiety.

11. The family structure of post divorce in such cases becomes:

Parent

Child

Other Parent

The child is empowered to be above the other parent by the narcissistic border line, and become judge for the other parent.

12. The way the narcissistic border line parent get the child to reject the other parent is using psychological control and causing the child to belief he is being victimized by the other parent. (This is in contrast to common belief that it is being done by "bad mouthing" the other child. "Bad mouthing" can not cause such rejection! Psychological control is the only way to reach the effect a child rejecting the other parent!).

Example of psychological control causing the child he is being victimized:

A child returns from a visit with the other parent.

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "How was the visit?"

The child answer: "All was fine."

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "No fight?"

The child answer: "No, no fight."

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "No argument about anything?"

The narcissistic border line parent will keep on, and as long as the child does not criticize the other parent begin to feel rejected and this is being transmitted as rejection to the child and the child receive the message "you do not communicate me the right thing.".

The moment the child realize that, he begin to provide the narcissistic border line parent "the right answer" and may answer: "Well, it was quite boring there".....

The narcissistic border line parent will often immediately inflame that: "Oh my god, I can't believe there was nothing planned for you there and you got bored. This is so selfish by your parent!".

It may look by observer that the child criticize the other parent and that the narcissistic border line parent is being supportive of the child. But NO! This is incredibly manipulative!

13. The narcissistic border line parent manipulating the child by providing the framework for the child to criticize the other parent and masking it under "supportive" sentences, and by repeating this over and over he creates the believe of the child he is being victimized by the other normal range parent.

14. Narcissistic border line pathology is created by a childhood trauma: Physical, psychological or sexual abuse. The patterns of the narcissistic border are: Abusive parent, Victimize Child, Protective Parent. The narcissistic border line person activate these pattern in the divorce as: Abusive Parent(The other parent), Victimized Child, Protective Parent(Myself) - It is called "The trauma reenactment". The narcissistic border line person reenacting their own childhood trauma in the current situation. The issue with AB-PA is that none of that narrative is true! The child is not victimized, the other parent is not abusive and the narcissistic border line parent is not a protective parent! It is all false trauma and all false narrative!

15. The moment the child become believing he is victimized that automatically the narcissistic border line parent defines the other parent as abusive and himself as protective.

The narcissistic border will say "I am protecting my child"

The child will say "The other parent abusing me"

16. I. Narcissistic border line parent

II. Child is under the effect of psychological control and become believer he is victimized by the other parent.

III. The Narcissistic border line parent reenacting their own childhood trauma and follow a false nerrative of Abusing Parent - Victimized Child - Protecting Parent.

17. The failure in recognizing AB-PA is NOT in the court system but rather in the professional psychology systems not providing proper guidance to court.

PA Republican House Caucus Meeting Ft. Dr Craig Childress

Child psychological abuse expert Dr. Craig Childress speaks on professional intervention in high conflict custody cases to determine the underlying dynamics accurately. It can be physical, sexual, or psychological (oftentimes referred to as "Parental Alienation"). Dr. Childress is careful to make the distinction between what he is describing; symptoms of child psychological abuse which can be referenced and defined in the DSM, as opposed to the term "Parental Alienation Syndrome" which has no verifiable scientific basis. Courtesy of Pennsylvania

"How it become that both my beloved daughters, ages 14 and 10 are apart from me, their loving father, and they now reject me and tell they do not want to see me, although I never acted or done anything against them or against their mother?"

-- Alienated Parent, 2017

AB-PA is the state, usually following divorce situation, when children or some of them are in total disconnection from one of the parents. The effected children are rejecting the connection with that parent although there never any action of any kind which done against them by that parent.

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AB-PA.org Attachment Based - Parental Alienation

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Summary of AB-PA explained:

1. AB-PA Stands for Attachment Base Parental Alienation. Attachment pathology and personality disorder pathology. The pathology derives solutions and methods for diagnosis and treatment.

2. AB-PA is not new form of pathology, this is standard and established pathology which relates to attachment pathology and personality disorder. AB-PA is the diagnosis.

9. Children have the right to love both parents and to be loved by both parents. There are four type of child-parent relationships: Mother-son, Mother-daughter, Father-son, Father-daughter. All of them are important for development and none of them are expandable.

Mother-son: The son will adopt his mother as a template for his wife and more

Mother-daugther: The daughter adapts female self esteem and self identity and she will use that as a template for raising her own children later and more

Father-son: the son adapts male self esteem and self identity and more

Father-daugher: The daughter adapts her father as a template for her husband and more

11. The family structure of post divorce in such cases becomes:

Parent

Child

Other Parent

The child is empowered to be above the other parent by the narcissistic border line, and become judge for the other parent.

Example of psychological control causing the child he is being victimized:

A child returns from a visit with the other parent.

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "How was the visit?"

The child answer: "All was fine."

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "No fight?"

The child answer: "No, no fight."

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "No argument about anything?"

The narcissistic border line parent will keep on, and as long as the child does not criticize the other parent begin to feel rejected and this is being transmitted as rejection to the child and the child receive the message "you do not communicate me the right thing.".

The moment the child realize that, he begin to provide the narcissistic border line parent "the right answer" and may answer: "Well, it was quite boring there".....

The narcissistic border line parent will often immediately inflame that: "Oh my god, I can't believe there was nothing planned for you there and you got bored. This is so selfish by your parent!".

It may look by observer that the child criticize the other parent and that the narcissistic border line parent is being supportive of the child. But NO! This is incredibly manipulative!

15. The moment the child become believing he is victimized that automatically the narcissistic border line parent defines the other parent as abusive and himself as protective.

The narcissistic border will say "I am protecting my child"

The child will say "The other parent abusing me"

16.

I. Narcissistic border line parent

II. Child is under the effect of psychological control and become believer he is victimized by the other parent.

III. The Narcissistic border line parent reenacting their own childhood trauma and follow a false nerrative of Abusing Parent - Victimized Child - Protecting Parent.

17. The failure in recognizing AB-PA is NOT in the court system but rather in the professional psychology systems not providing proper guidance to court.

PA Republican House Caucus Meeting Ft. Dr Craig Childress

"How it become that both my beloved daughters, ages 14 and 10 are apart from me, their loving father, and they now reject me and tell they do not want to see me, although I never acted or done anything against them or against their mother?"

-- Alienated Parent, 2017

AB-PA is the state, usually following divorce situation, when children or some of them are in total disconnection from one of the parents. The effected children are rejecting the connection with that parent although there never any action of any kind which done against them by that parent.

Summary of AB-PA explained:

​

1. AB-PA Stands for Attachment Base Parental Alienation. Attachment pathology and personality disorder pathology. The pathology derives solutions and methods for diagnosis and treatment.

​

2. AB-PA is not new form of pathology, this is standard and established pathology which relates to attachment pathology and personality disorder. AB-PA is the diagnosis.

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

9. Children have the right to love both parents and to be loved by both parents. There are four type of child-parent relationships: Mother-son, Mother-daughter, Father-son, Father-daughter. All of them are important for development and none of them are expandable.

Mother-son: The son will adopt his mother as a template for his wife and more

Mother-daugther: The daughter adapts female self esteem and self identity and she will use that as a template for raising her own children later and more

Father-son: the son adapts male self esteem and self identity and more

Father-daugher: The daughter adapts her father as a template for her husband and more

​

​

11. The family structure of post divorce in such cases becomes:

Parent

Child

Other Parent

The child is empowered to be above the other parent by the narcissistic border line, and become judge for the other parent.

​

Example of psychological control causing the child he is being victimized:

A child returns from a visit with the other parent.

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "How was the visit?"

The child answer: "All was fine."

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "No fight?"

The child answer: "No, no fight."

The narcissistic border line parent ask: "No argument about anything?"

​

The narcissistic border line parent will keep on, and as long as the child does not criticize the other parent begin to feel rejected and this is being transmitted as rejection to the child and the child receive the message "you do not communicate me the right thing.".

The moment the child realize that, he begin to provide the narcissistic border line parent "the right answer" and may answer: "Well, it was quite boring there".....

The narcissistic border line parent will often immediately inflame that: "Oh my god, I can't believe there was nothing planned for you there and you got bored. This is so selfish by your parent!".

​

It may look by observer that the child criticize the other parent and that the narcissistic border line parent is being supportive of the child. But NO! This is incredibly manipulative!

​

​

​

15. The moment the child become believing he is victimized that automatically the narcissistic border line parent defines the other parent as abusive and himself as protective.

The narcissistic border will say "I am protecting my child"

The child will say "The other parent abusing me"

​

16.

​

I. Narcissistic border line parent

II. Child is under the effect of psychological control and become believer he is victimized by the other parent.

III. The Narcissistic border line parent reenacting their own childhood trauma and follow a false nerrative of Abusing Parent - Victimized Child - Protecting Parent.

​

17. The failure in recognizing AB-PA is NOT in the court system but rather in the professional psychology systems not providing proper guidance to court.

​

​

​

​

​

PA Republican House Caucus Meeting Ft. Dr Craig Childress

​

"How it become that both my beloved daughters, ages 14 and 10 are apart from me, their loving father, and they now reject me and tell they do not want to see me, although I never acted or done anything against them or against their mother?"

-- Alienated Parent, 2017

​

AB-PA is the state, usually following divorce situation, when children or some of them are in total disconnection from one of the parents. The effected children are rejecting the connection with that parent although there never any action of any kind which done against them by that parent.